So, I learned a new word yesterday. I love learning new things, especially if it concerns christianity, psychology, and the effects of why we people do some of the things we do.
It was so strange, because I wasn't even looking for anything related to this subject, when I came across this new word I had never heard of before. The word is misogynist.
Misogynist basically means "hatred of women, by men". However, I've learned today in studying about it, that it can be women who struggle with hating women as well...or even women who hate men. The main definition is "men who hate women". The meaning is widespread and a bit more complicated.
This morning I've asked myself, "How does this apply to christians"? Well, I came across a book that pertains to this subject, and it is written from a christian perspective. It is very enlightening as well! I'm sure we have all brushed arms with this kind of mentality, or even struggled with it first hand. I'm planning to check for this book in our local library to learn about it, so then I can have more understanding for those who struggle.
The book is titled, Christian Men Who Hate Women: Healing Hurting Relationships. The main thing, is getting to the root of the pain which causes the behavior to develop. Then asking God to heal those parts, and teach us to live according to the TRUTH of the word of God...and not what WE want to make the word of God to say. ;)
Here is a great link that discusses the parts of the book, and also how this can effect relationships:
Christian Men Who Hate Women: Healing Hurting Relationships
Also, I'm finishing up a book titled, Codependent No More. It is a GREAT book that every person on the planet should read! Seriously, EVERYONE has some form of codependency! It varies from person to person, from extreme to mild forms. Mainly, if you have lived with or ever been exposed to in any way, an addict of any kind (alcoholic, drug addict, food addict, gambling addict, any or more of the above of addictions or compulsive behaviors), if you have been a caregiver long term to any of those who struggle with addictions or if you have been a caregiver to those who are mentally or physically sick...or have a natural tendency to be a caregiver, then you may get caught up in codependency. Even the addict, once they recover, can also flip toward codependency.
Soooooooooo...
Yeah, I'm codependent. And probably so are you..heehee. ;) Like I said...we ALL have a level of codependency. It is what it is. Now it is time to see it for what it is, and ask God daily to delivery us from those tendencies to fall into that trap of controlling/obsessing over the lives of others, or trying to gain the approval of others. :)
Here is the book I am currently reading. It is very straight forward, and there is some language and situations that are not for children. However, the book has raw and real situations where people share their stories, and those stories aren't always too pretty either.
The woman who wrote the book is a christian, yet she references many of the "12 step" suggestions that AA and Al Anon use that describe drawing from "your" higher power. So if you are a christian, you fill in the blank there of higher power.
It is a wonderful read. Especially for ministers and those in ministry, or those who are in caregiver types of occupations such as the medical field. These are fields where it is easy to slide into codependency.
If you think you are completely free from any of those tendencies, then good for you! Read it so you can glean a little understanding for others who struggle with addictions or codependency. :D
The book is: Codependent No More by Melody Beattie
I've found mine at the local library. Unless you want to "own" a copy, check there first. I have a friend who found a copy on paperback swap. So that is a great idea too. I've used them a lot, and it is a great way to recycle books.
The next book I want to read by this author is: Beyond Codependency: And Getting Better All the Time
There is also another book that is great for group studies on the subject, and it approaches codependency from a completely christian perspective. Untangling Relationships: A Christian Perspective on Codependency
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