What do you all think about this? I don't know if I completely believe it, but can't help but wonder.
Personally, I really don't get why it is so difficult for him to produce a birth certificate with a seal of authenticity imprinted!
When we had to travel out of state, I had to go to the state where I was born, and receive an authentic state sealed birth certificate, that was imprinted with the seal of authenticity because the country I was traveling to would not accept anything less.
So, why would the US accept anything less?...especially from The President of the United States?
This guy could be ripping people off...taking their money, etc. Yet, I still can't help but wonder what the big deal is, and why Obama can't produce an authentic birth certificate. Why is he hushing the hospital from producing it?
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Moving Again; Welcome to the Family!
So, we are getting geared up to pack for another move. :P
Even though it is in the same city, we still have to go through the motions of packing, breaking down furniture, and moving everything and setting up/unpacking again. Blah! I'm dreading it because the last move threw me into a flare for a few weeks; couldn't walk for a few days, had migraines from dealing with the pain. (No, this is not soreness from manual labor people...take your worst flu and multiply it by at least 10, and then keep it there for a few weeks...this is what it is like for a fibro flare. It is not just sore muscles. There is a huge difference ;)
Oh well, such as life, and can't complain because others do have far worse conditions they are dealing with! :) This too shall pass!!
Our family has been fighting some sort of flu/viral thing. Bubb had a high fever for a few days, body aches, nausea, headache, congestion. He still has congestion and sneezing now as I type this he is sneezing. However, he is doing so much better! YAY!
J; she has nausea, body aches, and congestion...in milder form though...no fever. They both had an occasional deep cough that would rear it's head at night. I've been giving them alkaselzer Cough and Cold gel tabs and Tylenol for fever.
I've had nausea, body aches, and fatigue. Of course, these are also fibro symptoms, so I never know if it is a virus or just typical symptoms of the syndrome.
Husband had it last week, and he is still coughing, but much much better overall.
Either way, I'm ready for us to all be WELL!!! Completely well again!!!! Especially since Oct and Nov are extremely busy months for us!
We are thankful for our church family! Many of our church friends have already told us to let them know of the move date, and they will help us move! So thankful!!!
When we moved here to this area last yr, husband and I had moved the majority ourselves. Then, the Pastor of (our now church...and another gentleman along with him), came to our rescue to move the heaviest pieces of furniture! Wow!!! What a God-send they were!!! Do you remember how heavy that armoire is Pastor??? lol. ;)
Speaking of church, our little family members are now all "PARTners". :) Such a good feeling to KNOW that we are going to be somewhere for awhile...so we can dig our heels in, connect with the folks, and the community.
These past few yrs I've been feeling like we've been living a gypsy life of being on the move! lol. (guess that is ministry for some folks, right??? Going where God leads :)
Through it all, God has taught us so much. He continues to teach us about His love for us, and our purpose. We are thankful for a Pastor and his sweet wife, family, our small group, and church family who are REAL; who apply God's word to TODAY. We can be ourselves, and they love us right where we are at, and guide us/point us to truth WITHOUT compromise. Yet does so in love, and without a condemning spirit. Our Pastor presents the truth, and allows the Holy Spirit to do His work...
The Holy Spirit through the word of God confronts, convicts, and guides us in all truth to keep us on the right track. The conviction isn't mean for us to feel sorrow unto death (except to die to our fleshly desires and agendas), but it is meant to bring sorrow unto repentance...to repent/turn away from our sin, and draw nearer to God. :) He loves us that much.
Even though it is in the same city, we still have to go through the motions of packing, breaking down furniture, and moving everything and setting up/unpacking again. Blah! I'm dreading it because the last move threw me into a flare for a few weeks; couldn't walk for a few days, had migraines from dealing with the pain. (No, this is not soreness from manual labor people...take your worst flu and multiply it by at least 10, and then keep it there for a few weeks...this is what it is like for a fibro flare. It is not just sore muscles. There is a huge difference ;)
Oh well, such as life, and can't complain because others do have far worse conditions they are dealing with! :) This too shall pass!!
Our family has been fighting some sort of flu/viral thing. Bubb had a high fever for a few days, body aches, nausea, headache, congestion. He still has congestion and sneezing now as I type this he is sneezing. However, he is doing so much better! YAY!
J; she has nausea, body aches, and congestion...in milder form though...no fever. They both had an occasional deep cough that would rear it's head at night. I've been giving them alkaselzer Cough and Cold gel tabs and Tylenol for fever.
I've had nausea, body aches, and fatigue. Of course, these are also fibro symptoms, so I never know if it is a virus or just typical symptoms of the syndrome.
Husband had it last week, and he is still coughing, but much much better overall.
Either way, I'm ready for us to all be WELL!!! Completely well again!!!! Especially since Oct and Nov are extremely busy months for us!
We are thankful for our church family! Many of our church friends have already told us to let them know of the move date, and they will help us move! So thankful!!!
When we moved here to this area last yr, husband and I had moved the majority ourselves. Then, the Pastor of (our now church...and another gentleman along with him), came to our rescue to move the heaviest pieces of furniture! Wow!!! What a God-send they were!!! Do you remember how heavy that armoire is Pastor??? lol. ;)
Speaking of church, our little family members are now all "PARTners". :) Such a good feeling to KNOW that we are going to be somewhere for awhile...so we can dig our heels in, connect with the folks, and the community.
These past few yrs I've been feeling like we've been living a gypsy life of being on the move! lol. (guess that is ministry for some folks, right??? Going where God leads :)
Through it all, God has taught us so much. He continues to teach us about His love for us, and our purpose. We are thankful for a Pastor and his sweet wife, family, our small group, and church family who are REAL; who apply God's word to TODAY. We can be ourselves, and they love us right where we are at, and guide us/point us to truth WITHOUT compromise. Yet does so in love, and without a condemning spirit. Our Pastor presents the truth, and allows the Holy Spirit to do His work...
The Holy Spirit through the word of God confronts, convicts, and guides us in all truth to keep us on the right track. The conviction isn't mean for us to feel sorrow unto death (except to die to our fleshly desires and agendas), but it is meant to bring sorrow unto repentance...to repent/turn away from our sin, and draw nearer to God. :) He loves us that much.
Labels:
Christian encouragement,
christianity,
church,
moving
Monday, September 21, 2009
Under the Weather
Our little fam is feeling sickly today. It began yesterday morning. Bubb had a fever, sore throat and had coughed during the previous night (J told us that morning that she heard him cough in the night). J, woke up Sun morning with a sore throat as well.
Last week husband had these symptoms; fever, fatigue, sore throat and cough. He rested for a few days and feels much better...although his cough seems to be lingering.
This morning, I feel nauseated and weak, but no fever. Last night and early am, Bubb had a fever of up to 102.1, swollen and red cheeks, cough, and body aches. He and I are still weak and have nausea this morning, but his fever finally broke.
We have been so blessed this past year, and have all stayed pretty well for the most part. It seems this time of year is when the cold and flu season kicks in. We've not taken the flu shots. There is so much debate about the safety of the flu shots, and it concerns us. Every time husband has taken the flu shot, he always gets the flu full blown! So, he will definitely not be taking it.
The children and I are going to rest and stay in this week. We want to be sure of what we are dealing with. Right now it seems viral. I read from the cdc not to panic just because you have similar symptoms as the h1n1, but to only contact your physician if your symptom get increasingly worse, and not better. We will wait another day before we call or physician, to see if the symptoms keep improving. Bubb's have improved this morning.
Hope this finds everyone well! Fall is upon us, and I feel the crisp cool air in the evening; looking forward to the cooler weather, and the change of the season!
Last week husband had these symptoms; fever, fatigue, sore throat and cough. He rested for a few days and feels much better...although his cough seems to be lingering.
This morning, I feel nauseated and weak, but no fever. Last night and early am, Bubb had a fever of up to 102.1, swollen and red cheeks, cough, and body aches. He and I are still weak and have nausea this morning, but his fever finally broke.
We have been so blessed this past year, and have all stayed pretty well for the most part. It seems this time of year is when the cold and flu season kicks in. We've not taken the flu shots. There is so much debate about the safety of the flu shots, and it concerns us. Every time husband has taken the flu shot, he always gets the flu full blown! So, he will definitely not be taking it.
The children and I are going to rest and stay in this week. We want to be sure of what we are dealing with. Right now it seems viral. I read from the cdc not to panic just because you have similar symptoms as the h1n1, but to only contact your physician if your symptom get increasingly worse, and not better. We will wait another day before we call or physician, to see if the symptoms keep improving. Bubb's have improved this morning.
Hope this finds everyone well! Fall is upon us, and I feel the crisp cool air in the evening; looking forward to the cooler weather, and the change of the season!
Tuesday, September 15, 2009
9 Mon Post Op for Our Girl!
J had her 9 mon. post op check up today. The Scoliosis surgeon is very pleased with her progress. The only slight concern is her cervical spine is relaxing forward. Right now they will not do anything about this... not until it becomes an issue of pain for her.
She has been released to do normal activities (but not wide open at them) He wants her to continue to gradually build up to normal activity. :)
Here are J's actual X-rays from today's appointment:
Lateral View: (Yep, all of those screws and hardware are in our little girl!!)
Posterior View:
Nice straight spine and hips are so much straighter! I'm going to try to snap some before shots of the X-Rays next time I get by the office. They do not have a system where they can email the images to me. I have to take my camera, and snap them when they are put up on the wall.
I was so caught up in the report from the Dr (questions and answers, etc), I totally forgot about getting the before shots of her X-Rays...duh! lol. However, the office is not far away, so I'll get by there another day to see if the X-Ray tech will put them up for me again (on a less busy day-they were quite busy today!!).
She has been released to do normal activities (but not wide open at them) He wants her to continue to gradually build up to normal activity. :)
Here are J's actual X-rays from today's appointment:
Lateral View: (Yep, all of those screws and hardware are in our little girl!!)
Posterior View:
Nice straight spine and hips are so much straighter! I'm going to try to snap some before shots of the X-Rays next time I get by the office. They do not have a system where they can email the images to me. I have to take my camera, and snap them when they are put up on the wall.
I was so caught up in the report from the Dr (questions and answers, etc), I totally forgot about getting the before shots of her X-Rays...duh! lol. However, the office is not far away, so I'll get by there another day to see if the X-Ray tech will put them up for me again (on a less busy day-they were quite busy today!!).
Labels:
scoliosis post op,
scoliosis surgery
Monday, September 14, 2009
Do Medicines Really Help?
With my physical conditions, the symptoms are like those of MS.
Recently, I got curious about the blood pressure medicine I am taking. There is another medicine I have been prescribed and I wanted to see if it would interact ok. Let's face it, Dr's have prescribed me meds before that do NOT mix well together!! They are only human thought.
Come to find out...the side effects of the bp med that I take, causes muscle aches and pain, and flu-like symptoms. No wonder I am struggling that much more with these particular symptoms!!
Here is the list and I'm putting an asterisk beside the symptoms I'm experiencing daily!
Lisinopril side effects:
hives; severe stomach pain; difficulty breathing; swelling of your face, lips, tongue, or throat.
* feeling light-headed, fainting;
* urinating (*more) or less than usual, or not at all;
* fever, chills, body aches, flu symptoms;
* tired feeling, muscle weakness, and pounding or uneven heartbeats;
chest pain; or
* swelling, rapid weight gain.
Less serious lisinopril side effects may include:
cough;
dizziness, * drowsiness, * headache;
*nausea, vomiting, *diarrhea, *upset stomach; or
*mild skin itching, or rash.
This is not a complete list of side effects and others may occur. Call your doctor for medical advice about side effects. You may report side effects to FDA at 1-800-FDA-1088.
So...there are a lot I have checked off. But these can also be fibromyalgia symptoms as well as ms symptoms. Frustrating! Looks like I'm making another trip to the Dr soon. But it is always the same thing...more tests, different medications, and then side effects from the meds that can make things worse in other areas!
Sometimes I think I should just stay off of everything, and live life to the fullest, take care of myself best I can, and trust God for the rest. We are all dying from something! These earthly bodies were not meant to be healed forever here on earth.
Our healing comes through Christ, when He returns we will receive our heavenly perfect bodies! I've seen very healthy loved ones die an early death...the picture of health! Then, I've seen folks who aren't as physically healthy, who live long happy lives too. In my opinion, when my work is done here on earth, and God is ready to take me home...He determines when my time is up! Try as I might, I'm not God and I don't determine that...
Recently, I got curious about the blood pressure medicine I am taking. There is another medicine I have been prescribed and I wanted to see if it would interact ok. Let's face it, Dr's have prescribed me meds before that do NOT mix well together!! They are only human thought.
Come to find out...the side effects of the bp med that I take, causes muscle aches and pain, and flu-like symptoms. No wonder I am struggling that much more with these particular symptoms!!
Here is the list and I'm putting an asterisk beside the symptoms I'm experiencing daily!
Lisinopril side effects:
hives; severe stomach pain; difficulty breathing; swelling of your face, lips, tongue, or throat.
* feeling light-headed, fainting;
* urinating (*more) or less than usual, or not at all;
* fever, chills, body aches, flu symptoms;
* tired feeling, muscle weakness, and pounding or uneven heartbeats;
chest pain; or
* swelling, rapid weight gain.
Less serious lisinopril side effects may include:
cough;
dizziness, * drowsiness, * headache;
*nausea, vomiting, *diarrhea, *upset stomach; or
*mild skin itching, or rash.
This is not a complete list of side effects and others may occur. Call your doctor for medical advice about side effects. You may report side effects to FDA at 1-800-FDA-1088.
So...there are a lot I have checked off. But these can also be fibromyalgia symptoms as well as ms symptoms. Frustrating! Looks like I'm making another trip to the Dr soon. But it is always the same thing...more tests, different medications, and then side effects from the meds that can make things worse in other areas!
Sometimes I think I should just stay off of everything, and live life to the fullest, take care of myself best I can, and trust God for the rest. We are all dying from something! These earthly bodies were not meant to be healed forever here on earth.
Our healing comes through Christ, when He returns we will receive our heavenly perfect bodies! I've seen very healthy loved ones die an early death...the picture of health! Then, I've seen folks who aren't as physically healthy, who live long happy lives too. In my opinion, when my work is done here on earth, and God is ready to take me home...He determines when my time is up! Try as I might, I'm not God and I don't determine that...
Labels:
blood pressure,
health,
lisinopril,
medications
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Do You Think I'm Beautiful???
God never ceases to amaze me.
Last weekend we had a dear lady over for dinner. We were celebrating J's birthday, and this lady has been a special part of her life the past yr. She was so significant in building J up in the Lord, when times were so uncertain for us.
We had just moved away from everyone we've ever known. Not to mention, just prior to our moving, she (we all) had lost her dear grandfather aka GaGa to the dreaded C word...cancer. God sent to J, Bubb, David and I this encouragement by way of a piano instruction, and this very godly woman!
Well, during our lunch celebration last weekend with this sweet lady, husband and I got into a very "deep" conversation about certain questions; concerning the Lord, and the Bible. One that we got stuck on: "How do we truly know the will of God for our lives?"
This is an age old question for christians, that seems to always come around from time to time for us. We pray, we seek God through His word...we believe God is leading us in a certain direction...them BAM, God has us going in another.
Does anyone go through this too?
In our conversation, our friend told us this: "I believe if God wants you to be in a certain place, it will come around again if we truly have a heart to serve the Lord, and yield to his will".
Since this past weekend, I've thought about this. I asked of the Lord to show me if this is true.
The children and I have been doing our Bible studies and reading of God's word in Proverbs 2, and the word of the Lord says that above all else to seek wisdom through the Bible. First, in the word of God, time with God, but also through wise believers in Christ who are older, and wiser in the Lord. I've noticed so many folks much younger than I (and some older too), do not attend their ears to the wise godly counsel and experience of the older who are spiritually wiser. I don't want to be that kind of person. Of course, I'm approaching 50 myself, but those ladies who are older and wiser need to be heard. Even with hearing, we always need to be sure it lines up with the word of God.
This week God has shown me the importance of this. Many years ago the Lord put a desire to lead worship in my heart, since I was a young girl. When I was around age 7-8, I'd walk the streets of our neighborhood, make up songs and sing them to God. At an early age I had an awareness of God's presence with me, and so loved that comfort of His presence. I attended christian schools where I had to memorize scripture, so many of my songs were of me singing scriptures.
Later in years, choir was my favorite! I've never learned to read music, however I could sing what I heard. So this is what I did...mostly with groups...then later in church choirs.
Through the years God has been calling me out, yet staying in the crowd was more comfortable. It wasn't until I was in my late 20's that I actually got the courage to sing with a small praise team at Lower Creek Baptist Church. Then little by little I tried duets, then solos. Still, I never felt worthy enough or good enough.
The first "official" tryout I had was at Mountain Grove. In front of the music minister...and 3 other music ministers from the area. Shaking from head to toe, I sang, "God Loves You". After singing it I went home and thought to myself...it is OK that I didn't make it. I can still sing in my car and in my shower. :) Then found out later... that I HAD made it. :) The first opening to our church membership classes, a Wed night... I sang for the first time in a church of 800-1000! Yikes! God was taking me out of my comfort zone!
Still today, I have trouble being out of my comfort zone. Sometimes I wonder if this keeps me so relying on God.
My life through the yrs has been a series of attempts, and fear of failure. I pull out, just when things get going...and get a little tough...something might happen, and I mentally sabotage everything with my sense of not feeling worthy enough.
The instruments I have always wanted to learn was the piano, guitar, and violin. I've taken up piano, and put it away about 3 times. I was given a keyboard, and gave it back out of discouragement. When we moved away, God led me to another instructor, and to another keyboard. Then we moved again. It seems like something is always breaking the flow of this process. I've taken song writing lessons...didn't get to complete those due to finances (and have unfinished half written songs in my notebook...some that God woke me in the night with)
So, I asked God...are the struggles and roadblocks You saying to me "no"? Or not yet?? Or are these struggles and times of discouragement normal opposition (the enemy trying to distract and discourage me), and I just need to press in and press through...even if it is with the instrument, by myself, and with God...do I keep going?
Well, God has shown me through the music, that He does not let me go in this area. He does love me and pursue me with my calling of worship, because He knows how much I love Him, and desire to serve him.
Sometimes I wonder if other distractions come into play because it is easy for me to focus on something that comes natural AND is comfortable (such as art/photography) So...Do I do both music and photography? Or do I only focus on the music? Do I finish my degree which is in a totally different field??? These things I do not know. But do know that God keeps bringing the music back. Also, my family and children's education are of first priority. Wonder how those who are in ministry keep everything in balance!
Ok, so this morning??? I look down on my shelf, and notice an old journal that I had not picked up in several yrs. It is one that was given to me for my birthday...by my friend Cindy Lou Who. It has a coffee cup on the front (YUM LOVE COFFEE), and a beautiful piano instrumental CD in it (AHHHH LOVE THE PIANO). This friend knows my heart! :) I used this journal during a women's conference back home that Wade and Francine Ivey led. Francine always did a part of the conference encouraging women to walk in the Love of Christ...reminding us that we ARE "daughter's of the King of Kings".
There were interesting words on the pages of that journal. Words that eyes had not seen, nor hands have written in several years. In those words, the dreams God placed on my heart; one about creating a worship CD that would encourage the wounded and hurt hearts of the world. There are scriptures, and encouraging God given words on those pages. One being *We are being transformed from Glory to Glory. EVERY day put off the "old you", and allow the "new you" to come alive. This statement (which is based on scripture) reminded me that this is a DAILY battle of the mind. God never said he waves a magic wand over us, and we are all of the sudden happy and perfect. He said in this world we WILL have troubles, but to take heart because He has overcome the world. God's word reminds us that we are "renewing our minds every day".
Part of the struggles are from so many years of being called names, being told I am fat and ugly. Yes, those things are in the past, but they did effect who I am today. They are struggles in my mind that I daily choose to overcome. So yes people, those kinds of words hurt kids, and cause long lasting effects on people's lives!!
Recently a new friend from our church here gave me a book titled, "Do You Think I'm Beautiful" by Angela Thomas. I've not read it yet, but will soon.
Guess what was in this journal from the women's conference of yrs ago??? A suggestion from Francine Ivey to the ladies, to read the book, "Do You Think I'm Beautiful". Along with the verse Colossians 3:9-10 (New Living Translation)
9 Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds. 10 Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him.
Isn't it so neat how God works? When He knows something is going to be good for us/part of His path and plan for our lives, He presents it again and again. (Thank you Cessie for hearing from God and bringing me that book) Not only the words, but even sometimes the people who once encouraged us in the Lord. In the past yr I had hooked up with Francine, and several of my friends from that conference who deeply shared that experience. God is so neat like that!
Our pastor back home in western NC says this saying a lot; "God never wastes time or circumstances". Also, the sweet lady here in eastern NC says a similar saying, "Nothing is EVER wasted with God".
So, do I think I am beautiful? The answer is No. It isn't really all about what I think though...it is about what God thinks of me. It is about knowing that in Christ, he made me new and that He sees beauty in me. He created me and he thinks I am beautiful. So what He thinks of me is all that matters.
Other's around me will always be judging me or gossiping about me...or telling how I need to do certain things certain ways, or telling me who they think I am...or telling me that I am no good, and do not know how to do anything right. God knows the heart, and he sees things others don't. He sees it all, knows the real me, and the honest truth of the matter! He sees the GOOD in me, even when others (or I) don't.
God, You put the desires in my heart, as I seek You through your word, let me hear only Your voice gently guiding me. May I know and recognize whether others are speaking from Your heart, or from their own.
Last weekend we had a dear lady over for dinner. We were celebrating J's birthday, and this lady has been a special part of her life the past yr. She was so significant in building J up in the Lord, when times were so uncertain for us.
We had just moved away from everyone we've ever known. Not to mention, just prior to our moving, she (we all) had lost her dear grandfather aka GaGa to the dreaded C word...cancer. God sent to J, Bubb, David and I this encouragement by way of a piano instruction, and this very godly woman!
Well, during our lunch celebration last weekend with this sweet lady, husband and I got into a very "deep" conversation about certain questions; concerning the Lord, and the Bible. One that we got stuck on: "How do we truly know the will of God for our lives?"
This is an age old question for christians, that seems to always come around from time to time for us. We pray, we seek God through His word...we believe God is leading us in a certain direction...them BAM, God has us going in another.
Does anyone go through this too?
In our conversation, our friend told us this: "I believe if God wants you to be in a certain place, it will come around again if we truly have a heart to serve the Lord, and yield to his will".
Since this past weekend, I've thought about this. I asked of the Lord to show me if this is true.
The children and I have been doing our Bible studies and reading of God's word in Proverbs 2, and the word of the Lord says that above all else to seek wisdom through the Bible. First, in the word of God, time with God, but also through wise believers in Christ who are older, and wiser in the Lord. I've noticed so many folks much younger than I (and some older too), do not attend their ears to the wise godly counsel and experience of the older who are spiritually wiser. I don't want to be that kind of person. Of course, I'm approaching 50 myself, but those ladies who are older and wiser need to be heard. Even with hearing, we always need to be sure it lines up with the word of God.
This week God has shown me the importance of this. Many years ago the Lord put a desire to lead worship in my heart, since I was a young girl. When I was around age 7-8, I'd walk the streets of our neighborhood, make up songs and sing them to God. At an early age I had an awareness of God's presence with me, and so loved that comfort of His presence. I attended christian schools where I had to memorize scripture, so many of my songs were of me singing scriptures.
Later in years, choir was my favorite! I've never learned to read music, however I could sing what I heard. So this is what I did...mostly with groups...then later in church choirs.
Through the years God has been calling me out, yet staying in the crowd was more comfortable. It wasn't until I was in my late 20's that I actually got the courage to sing with a small praise team at Lower Creek Baptist Church. Then little by little I tried duets, then solos. Still, I never felt worthy enough or good enough.
The first "official" tryout I had was at Mountain Grove. In front of the music minister...and 3 other music ministers from the area. Shaking from head to toe, I sang, "God Loves You". After singing it I went home and thought to myself...it is OK that I didn't make it. I can still sing in my car and in my shower. :) Then found out later... that I HAD made it. :) The first opening to our church membership classes, a Wed night... I sang for the first time in a church of 800-1000! Yikes! God was taking me out of my comfort zone!
Still today, I have trouble being out of my comfort zone. Sometimes I wonder if this keeps me so relying on God.
My life through the yrs has been a series of attempts, and fear of failure. I pull out, just when things get going...and get a little tough...something might happen, and I mentally sabotage everything with my sense of not feeling worthy enough.
The instruments I have always wanted to learn was the piano, guitar, and violin. I've taken up piano, and put it away about 3 times. I was given a keyboard, and gave it back out of discouragement. When we moved away, God led me to another instructor, and to another keyboard. Then we moved again. It seems like something is always breaking the flow of this process. I've taken song writing lessons...didn't get to complete those due to finances (and have unfinished half written songs in my notebook...some that God woke me in the night with)
So, I asked God...are the struggles and roadblocks You saying to me "no"? Or not yet?? Or are these struggles and times of discouragement normal opposition (the enemy trying to distract and discourage me), and I just need to press in and press through...even if it is with the instrument, by myself, and with God...do I keep going?
Well, God has shown me through the music, that He does not let me go in this area. He does love me and pursue me with my calling of worship, because He knows how much I love Him, and desire to serve him.
Sometimes I wonder if other distractions come into play because it is easy for me to focus on something that comes natural AND is comfortable (such as art/photography) So...Do I do both music and photography? Or do I only focus on the music? Do I finish my degree which is in a totally different field??? These things I do not know. But do know that God keeps bringing the music back. Also, my family and children's education are of first priority. Wonder how those who are in ministry keep everything in balance!
Ok, so this morning??? I look down on my shelf, and notice an old journal that I had not picked up in several yrs. It is one that was given to me for my birthday...by my friend Cindy Lou Who. It has a coffee cup on the front (YUM LOVE COFFEE), and a beautiful piano instrumental CD in it (AHHHH LOVE THE PIANO). This friend knows my heart! :) I used this journal during a women's conference back home that Wade and Francine Ivey led. Francine always did a part of the conference encouraging women to walk in the Love of Christ...reminding us that we ARE "daughter's of the King of Kings".
There were interesting words on the pages of that journal. Words that eyes had not seen, nor hands have written in several years. In those words, the dreams God placed on my heart; one about creating a worship CD that would encourage the wounded and hurt hearts of the world. There are scriptures, and encouraging God given words on those pages. One being *We are being transformed from Glory to Glory. EVERY day put off the "old you", and allow the "new you" to come alive. This statement (which is based on scripture) reminded me that this is a DAILY battle of the mind. God never said he waves a magic wand over us, and we are all of the sudden happy and perfect. He said in this world we WILL have troubles, but to take heart because He has overcome the world. God's word reminds us that we are "renewing our minds every day".
Part of the struggles are from so many years of being called names, being told I am fat and ugly. Yes, those things are in the past, but they did effect who I am today. They are struggles in my mind that I daily choose to overcome. So yes people, those kinds of words hurt kids, and cause long lasting effects on people's lives!!
Recently a new friend from our church here gave me a book titled, "Do You Think I'm Beautiful" by Angela Thomas. I've not read it yet, but will soon.
Guess what was in this journal from the women's conference of yrs ago??? A suggestion from Francine Ivey to the ladies, to read the book, "Do You Think I'm Beautiful". Along with the verse Colossians 3:9-10 (New Living Translation)
9 Don’t lie to each other, for you have stripped off your old sinful nature and all its wicked deeds. 10 Put on your new nature, and be renewed as you learn to know your Creator and become like him.
Isn't it so neat how God works? When He knows something is going to be good for us/part of His path and plan for our lives, He presents it again and again. (Thank you Cessie for hearing from God and bringing me that book) Not only the words, but even sometimes the people who once encouraged us in the Lord. In the past yr I had hooked up with Francine, and several of my friends from that conference who deeply shared that experience. God is so neat like that!
Our pastor back home in western NC says this saying a lot; "God never wastes time or circumstances". Also, the sweet lady here in eastern NC says a similar saying, "Nothing is EVER wasted with God".
So, do I think I am beautiful? The answer is No. It isn't really all about what I think though...it is about what God thinks of me. It is about knowing that in Christ, he made me new and that He sees beauty in me. He created me and he thinks I am beautiful. So what He thinks of me is all that matters.
Other's around me will always be judging me or gossiping about me...or telling how I need to do certain things certain ways, or telling me who they think I am...or telling me that I am no good, and do not know how to do anything right. God knows the heart, and he sees things others don't. He sees it all, knows the real me, and the honest truth of the matter! He sees the GOOD in me, even when others (or I) don't.
God, You put the desires in my heart, as I seek You through your word, let me hear only Your voice gently guiding me. May I know and recognize whether others are speaking from Your heart, or from their own.
Thursday, September 3, 2009
Happy Birthday to Our Girl!
Our little princess is officially a "teen". She is not this little girl anymore...(even though daddy will probably always see her this way ;)
She is this beautiful young lady...
Where has the time gone!???!!! It is so fleeting!!!
So I remind all of you young mothers out there...cherish every moment! Soon, you will see that sweet baby become a young person; who is either eye to eye with you, or towering over you!!!
Happy 13th to our young lady! We never imagined how so blessed and enriched our lives would be by having you! In so many wonderful ways you light up our world, and the world around you. The sweet spirit of God radiates through your life.
Stay close to Jesus, sweet teen. He will always guide you in the way you should go...so much better than Dad or I can.
Have an AWESOME DAY! We will be celebrating all weekend. ;)
She is this beautiful young lady...
Where has the time gone!???!!! It is so fleeting!!!
So I remind all of you young mothers out there...cherish every moment! Soon, you will see that sweet baby become a young person; who is either eye to eye with you, or towering over you!!!
Happy 13th to our young lady! We never imagined how so blessed and enriched our lives would be by having you! In so many wonderful ways you light up our world, and the world around you. The sweet spirit of God radiates through your life.
Stay close to Jesus, sweet teen. He will always guide you in the way you should go...so much better than Dad or I can.
Have an AWESOME DAY! We will be celebrating all weekend. ;)
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